No More Excuses: The Power of Personal Accountability

I think it was Einstein that said doing the same thing over

and over and expecting different results was the

definition of insanity. And so today

we're going to hold up that mirror, take a long look at it,

and talk about personal accountability.

Feeding my faith.

Well, God's word is made simple.

Yeah, so I

work for a software company that operates online. If you want

to sound like a nerd, you say it's a SaaS project because it's

software as a service. And I was

somewhat surprised because it's the day after

Thanksgiving, you know, you're still kind of on

a turkey hangover. And I get a nasty gram from

a customer who is usually not nasty. And

he's explaining how well this company and this company

and this company all charged me for my

yearly subscription. And I was really surprised

that your company did as well.

You know, you should have sent me a reminder.

And this is how I have. You know, he went into this whole thing. I

won't get into the details, but it was all our fault

because, well, we didn't remind him

and it took a lot for me to not go.

Have you checked your checkbook in a while? Have you?

You know, and so I wanted to look into this

because especially my sister

in law is a teacher. She teaches young kids.

And it's amazing how I hear parents

that are letting the inmates run the asylum. And I'm like,

wait, how old is this kid? Seven? I wouldn't be alive if

I said that to my parents. And so

why do we not take accountability

for our actions? We can complain. Oh, it's so

fun to complain and so easy. And

yet we don't look at ourselves and go, well, that's not

working. Maybe we should try something else.

So the first one. Oh, this was my mantra when I

was probably 12. Driving my poor dad nuts.

It's not fair. It's not fair

because I wanted it to make sense. And my dad would

lovingly and with lots of compassion look at me and said, life's

not fair. Deal with it, basically.

And especially if it's like, well, so and so, got to do this.

Okay, number one, envy anyone.

And you know, we're looking at our, our other people,

we're comparing ourselves. There's the whole, you know, comparison

is the thief of joy. And in Matthew

25, he says, you've been

faithful with a few things. I will put you in charge

of many things. So maybe God's just like, hey,

you're not ready yet, you're doing okay, but you

got a ways to go. But it's not fair. Yeah, ok,

no one ever told me. What do you mean? Nobody ever

told me that. Okay, well, did you

look, was it somewhere. I

got a story later, I'll tell you about that. But in many cases

it may be that you don't wanna know.

Maybe that, you know, medical

procedure that you've been putting off for five years. Right.

Or maybe you weren't paying attention. Or

maybe just in reality. Yeah. You saw it, you heard it

and you just ignored it. Yeah. Whose fault is

that? You know, I remember,

I think I've told the story on this show, but

my now ex wife and I were arguing. We were dating at

the time. We lived basically an hour apart.

And she was crying and I said, look, I really can't. I was going to

college at the time. I really can't. You don't understand when I

just. The trip to you is two hours and I've got to study

for this really important test. And she just pressured

me and pressured me and I could put all the blame on her,

but it was my hand that turned the key when I got in the car.

And as I was driving, like someone was

in the backseat. Like it scared me so

much I turned around because I thought someone

was in the backseat. And to this day I don't know if it was in

my head or if it was audibly. I heard it in the car, but

I heard the phrase, she's not the one for you and I about

crapped my pants and

I ended up breaking up with her. As you heard me

introduce her. She was my second ex wife and

I didn't listen. And when I look back, there were

so many red flags and I

ignored them all. So sometimes we're getting

the message or just not reading it and

then the other one is like, well, I would change, but that's just how

I am. And when I woke up today,

the, the power went off here in Ohio and there wasn't much

I could do. And I kind of just looked around and I'm like, you know,

Dave, you are 60 years old and your house is

always a mess. Which was fine when you're 21 or

24 or whatever, but it's like the whole like, man, you live like a

bachelor. Yeah, but I'm a 60 year old bachelor. I'm

like. And I, you know, there's, as I look right now, there's

stuff that I threw at the, the trash can that I haven't picked up.

You know, I got a couple pens on the floor. Apparently it's just too Much

for me to bend down and pick stuff up. I don't know. But I was

like, you know, when I go to other people's houses,

it doesn't look like a, you know, 12 year old lives here. Maybe I should

do something about that. And whose fault is it? Oh, yeah, that's right.

It's mine. And so when I got done after

the power came back on, I ate lunch and I took my dish

to the kitchen, and instead of letting it sit on the counter forever, I

rinsed it off, which took all of two seconds, and stuck it in the

dishwasher along with my fork. And I was like, you know, that really

wasn't that hard. And when we say things like,

well, that's just how I am, that denies the power

of the Holy Spirit to change patterns of sowing

and reaping. You can change if you

want to, right? The old John Lennon

Christmas song, war is over. If you want it. Well,

you can change if you want it. Galatians

6, verses 8 and 9 shows how we can

change our harvest by changing our sewing.

Empowered by the Spirit,

it says, do not be deceived.

God cannot be mocked. Not a room for.

Not a lot of room for interpretation there. A man reaps what he

sows. Whoever sows to please the flesh

from the flesh will reap destruction. Whoever

sows to please the spirit from the Spirit

will reap eternal life. Let us not become

weary in doing good, for at the proper time

we will reap a harvest if we do not give

up. So

it's just how I am. No, no, no, no.

In Philippians, this is Paul Again, chapter 2, verses

12 through 14. He says, Therefore, my dear friends, as you have always

obeyed, not only in my presence, but

now much more in my absence, continue

to work out your salvation. And that's the phrase. You are working

out your salvation. And it says, with fear and trembling. But

that's not like worried about being punished. That's like, this is so important.

I hope I don't blow it. I know. I've been in choir

performances and we've practiced for months, and

finally the curtain goes up and you're like, man, I hope I'm not the one

guy that sings when you're not supposed to sing or whatever. And

Paul continues. He says, for it is God who works in you

to will and to act in order to fulfill his

good purpose. So we are working

out our salvation. We've got it. But

what kind of salvation do you want in Ezekiel? Here's

another one. Well, you know, I

know it's my fault, but. And this is, man, everybody's

a victim. And I mean everybody is a

victim. Everybody's got initials. I'm ADHD, ADD,

HPK. And I got it. Look, I'm ADHD.

I've never been diagnosed, but talk to me for 10 minutes, it's not hard

to figure out. But another thing is,

in every job I've had, they pulled me in because I was creative.

Well, yeah, I think different. My brain's wired different. And we love

to blame our parents. Look, the parents that you had did

the best they could with what they had and sometimes hurt people. Hurt people.

And that sucks. But I have a friend of

mine, really, almost like a second brother. He

lived in our house more than he did in his actual house.

Why? Because his parents were awful, and

he took the steps to figure out what was right and what

was wrong, and he changed that tide.

So in Ezekiel 18:20, the one

who sins is the one who will die. The

child will not share the guilt of the parent, nor the

parent share the guilt of the child. The

righteousness of the righteous will be credited to them,

and the wickedness of the wicked will be charged

against them. In other words, it's your

responsibility. You can't blame it on your parents. Your parents

can't blame it on you. Like, we are all

responsible for our own actions.

And so. And again, God cannot be

mocked. And so here's just. I'm going to

throw myself under the bus a little here. According to the

Internet, I just looked this up. I am 43

pounds overweight. That's a lot of weight.

And it's always. I remember on occasion I would get up to this weight, and

I'm like, ooh. And I would finally start doing what I was supposed to

do. But that was about six pounds ago. And I

realized it's like, you know, the week of Thanksgiving. I've probably got a couple

extra on there, but nonetheless. And even

in some cases, as we get older, we get medicines

that make it much easier to gain weight. Thanks,

But I'm sorry. McDonald's, Dairy Queen,

Mountain Dew. Like, it was me who put the

McDonald's app on my phone. It's not like I woke up one day and went,

how'd that get there? You know, along with the

Dairy Queen app. And the McDonald's app is the

devil. Because every Friday goes, hey, it's

fry day. And all I got

to do is swipe left and go delete. And I will lose that alert,

you know? And if you're new to the show Mountain Dew is very

scary for me because if I drink one, if I don't watch

myself, I will end up drinking, you know, six

a day in about two weeks. But it was me that put it

in the cart. And I. Even now, as I record this

in my head, I'm going, and don't forget the caffeine headache that

comes along with that, because the last time I got kind of stuck on Mountain

Dew and I finally quit, my head hurt

like somebody put a belt on it and was just, you know, ratcheting it

down. So again, it's. It

was me. I can't blame anybody else for that.

And so when I look at my. My weight,

I just got to ask myself, so how's that working for you?

That McDonald's and the dairy Queen? You know, Hey,

I. I got a treadmill. Yeah, you're active. You're

not really exercising. And while active is better than sitting on the couch

all day. Yeah. How's it working for you?

It's not okay. Well, then maybe we should try something

else. When I was in my 20s, I had to file

bankruptcy after charging three cards to their max.

And, sure, a fair amount of that was fertility treatments.

And when I was doing that, I knew it wasn't a good idea.

When we started on the third card, I was like, this is not a good

idea. And we just kept trying because we really wanted

kids. But I'm also sure that if I went back

and could find the statements for those credit cards, you'd probably find

something from Best Buy. You'd probably find some purchases from

the Shoe Warehouse. You know,

we like to go, well, we were trying. You know, we'll just point to

the. Kind of like, we're trying to have a kid. Yeah.

Had we actually had a kid, there would have been no way

to afford that. Kids are really expensive. But that

was me, and I knew it. I heard the voice going, this isn't a good

idea. And again, we ignore it.

And I'm sure, look, I got. I'm not proud to say

I have two ex wives. I'm not proud of that at all.

And I could easily just point the finger at them like,

well, the first one was a cheater, and the second one was crazy.

Okay? But when you point at people, you got three fingers pointing back

at you. What's the one equation that's the constant there. You

know, the Bible, many different times

in Proverbs, says that ignoring counsel leads to

failure and that you will fall. And while

listening to the advice and having many counselors bring

stability, safety, and success.

And so there are definitely things I have learned,

especially from. Well, actually from both. Right. That'd be really

stupid if I didn't learn anything. And so

I take that as like, well, especially my second

marriage was very expensive.

I'm still paying for that thing. 2nd Corinthians

5:10. For we must all appear before

the judgment seat of Christ, so that each of us may

receive what is due for us for the things done while in

the body, whether good or bad.

That's what's coming our way. Not a surprise.

And I realize that we are lucky. We

are so blessed to have God's grace. God forgives us

for all the crappy things we do. But grace, it

doesn't cancel the law of sowing and reaping.

It redeems the sower and gives them

a fresh start in the field. We just need to take

advantage of that. Don't wait

until you, you know, I'm thirsty. And then you start digging the

well. No, that's not the time. You dig before you're

thirsty. If you hate your boss and your job is

just, ugh, well, it's time to dust off the resume.

Why? You just stay where you're at. Well, try something

new. Got problems with your kids? Here's something

you might want to try. It's not easy, by the way.

Have a conversation with them. Where your number one focus

is, is just listening to them. And then

when you're done, repeat what they said. Paraphrase it to make

sure you understand what's going on in their head before you

offer any advice. And maybe this time

you don't offer any advice. Maybe just let them know you love them

and that you need to think about this. But

there are consequences, and those

consequences can motivate us. And again, I

am hearing that young children

that have no business being in charge have zero

consequences. When I was growing up,

we weren't super rich. And I remember I

wanted to buy the album Tommy by the who because it had the song the

Pinball wizard on it, and the only way you could get it was

on the album. There was no 45 for that song. And for those

that are under 40, 45s were singles back in the day.

And so I remember I had to wash two cars. I think I had to

clean under the oven. There are all sorts of stuff I had to do

to get money. It wasn't like, oh, don't you understand, parents?

I'm entitled to the Pinball wizard song. Buy it for

me now was like, no, if you want money, you got to

work for it. No free lunches here. And

as much as, and I jokingly say my ex wife was

crazy because she's a fine person. We just.

I never understood the phrase when people said, I just married the wrong

person. And we both have said we should have dated a

lot longer than we did. But I will definitely credit

her for being a great parent and her youngest

son. One time we're just. I'd forget even what the deal

was, but we couldn't get him to do what we wanted him

to do. And she gave him an ultimatum. It's like, this has to be

done by this time or I'm taking your video

game and I'm gonna smash the crap out of it. Now it sounds like an

empty kind of threat, right? Do this or

I'm gonna smash it. Cause you're going, wait, that thing's what, 150 bucks?

200? I don't know. It's a lot of money. And so she told

him, hey, you got 15 minutes to get that done or

I'm taking that game and I'm going to smash the crap out of it. So

he got two warnings. And when that time came

and she said, hey, is that done? And he

said, no. Why? Because he was busy playing that video game.

She walked into his room, grabbed the game,

strutted off to the kitchen with her son behind her, grabbed a hammer

out of the drawer and smashed the crap out of it.

And I got to be telling you, I was standing right there going, I can't

believe she just smashed the crap out of it. But I'm here to tell you,

her son never questioned her again. And every single

one of her children are success and they're doing

exactly what they wanted to do. Alex is in the Navy

and both her daughters are nurses, and they have adorable children

because there were consequences. And because

when you threaten something, you got to

do it. Now, was that easy for her to do?

No, because she paid for the game Boy. And by the way,

he didn't get another one for free. Consequences.

And God is telling us consequences. I learned

about consequences in college. I had a professor

who, and I'm not making fun of him, this is just a fact. And I

was all of whatever, 22, he had a horrible

stutter. His favorite word was subtract.

And I, being kind of adhd, could not pay attention

to what he was saying as I was obsessed on how

he said it. And I was trying not to laugh because again, I was an

immature 22 year old. Well, Consequently,

I got a D in that class, and I'm here to tell you, I never

got a D ever. Like, I might get a C every now

and then, but I never got a D. And I had to

take the class again. In fact, when I first got my first D, I quit

school and I was like, I got a D. I can't do this.

And then it dawned on me. Hey, like, you still don't have

a degree. Oh, yeah, I needed that, I

guess. Yeah. And I'm not going to get the degree. You know,

slinging burgers at the local place. So I went back to school,

and he was the only guy that taught this class. And I was like,

how am I going to pass this? So the one thing, the first time I

took it, it was a night class, and it was ridiculous. It was like two

and a half hours a night, and he's going at a breakneck speed. This at

least was daily. So it was a slower pace, but I still had the

hardest time. And so by this time, the Internet

had kind of come around, and I found another source for the information

that explained it in a way I could comprehend. I took it upon

myself to go, all right, this isn't working. I got to

find something else. I got to find a different way. That was degree

number one. Degree number two is many years

later. And now most of the classes are online, and we

meet online, you know, this is before Zoom or whatever. And the

teacher's explaining that, hey, everything is in the syllabus. Be sure

to read the syllabus. And. And, you know, here's our schedule, yada,

yada, yada. And she kept saying, it's all in syllabus. And

I was like, okay, but I'm thinking, you know, we're going to get together

again like we just did, and do classes. And it was like,

no, actually, it's in the syllabus.

You read the book, you do the online quiz, and then you

do the test. And truly, she was

going to remind me that the, hey, the test is tomorrow. And

she didn't. And just like that guy that was complaining about,

hey, my yearly subscription went through. I was like,

hey, you didn't tell me there was a test tomorrow. That's not cool.

And her answer was, yeah, it's in the syllabus. I told

you. And I told you to read the syllabus. Did you read the syllabus?

And the answer was, not really.

And I. I was like, are you sure? Like, there's got. Can I take it

again and. And get an Automatic letter to. Done. No,

you're getting an F on that, Mr. Jackson. You got a zero. And

I was like, well, surely there's got to be a way that I can get

some points for it. And they're like, no,

welcome to reality. This is reality. You don't get a

redo on the job. Enjoy your F.

Well, guess what? From that point forward,

my grades were amazing because I would grab the

syllabus and I would put the

tests and all the other activities on my calendar

and I made the dean's list because my grades were so much

better. Why? Because I read the syllabus. It's an expensive

lesson. I think I ended up getting a C in that class

because it's hard to overcome a zero. But it's really

one of the best things that ever happened to me. And so,

on Judgment Day, there's not going to be a customer

service line. There is no, hey, can I speak to your manager, please?

Right. It's only going to be a savior who

died for you and a Lord who asks

you, like, what did you do with what I gave you?

It's really up to you. And if you're not happy with your life.

Jesus gave us a syllabus. It's called the Bible. He

told us to read it. Are you reading the syllabus?

Because if your life's not going well, there's probably some rules and

regulations and thoughts and insights that you go,

oh, maybe I'm doing this wrong. Maybe I

should try this. Because I thought about it. Have

I ever prayed about my weight? Not consistently

have I ever prayed. God, help me to not go to

Circle K and get a Mountain Dew, even though it's only a block and a

half away. Lord, help me to. I.

I'm. I'm feeling the need to go to Dairy Queen

because I lost £20 probably

15 years ago. And I just quit eating fast food

and I didn't drink soda. I drank water and it kind of

just melted off. Now I'm older, I

got no muscles that I used to have, and I've got to

find a different way. But if

you're not happy with your current story, it's

time to turn some pages and try something different.

Read the syllabus known as the Bible and follow the

teacher known as Jesus.

If you know somebody who might need a little

self discipline, might need to look in the mirror a little bit.

And this particular lesson was written for me. I'm talking to me right

now. Feel free to go to your phone,

share this episode with them or just send them over to

feedingmyfaith.com if this episode

brought value to you, then you want to say thanks, Dave.

You can go out to feedingmyfaith.com

support. Click on a button there. We got multiple ways that you can

help support the show because we've got bandwidth and hosting and all sorts of

other things that we do here that cost us money. Thank you so much.

Until the next episode. Take care. God bless.

Class is dismissed. Feeding my

faith what God's word is

made simple.